Did you ever think of it as a strength? Probably not, because rightfully so, you’re focusing on how it’s getting in the way of your life. And of being yourself.
Social anxiety is incredibly challenging. Frustrating. Annoying. And just plain old debilitating. To name a few things. Curse you social anxiety!
But, honestly? There's a whole other side to it as well. Because it's not just a downer, it has some good side effects.
I won’t downplay the adverse effects social anxiety has on your life or has had. If you've been hanging around for a bit, you'll know I'm fully transparent about the struggles of social anxiety. Sometimes, the struggle is never-ending because it keeps morphing and evolving.
Since I’ve been talking for years about this, I know very well how social anxiety holds you back from experiencing life.
It makes you feel disconnected and lonely.
It makes you feel like you'll never make any friends.
It makes you feel like there’s something wrong with you.
But what if we turn the tables around and look at the gifts (or shall I even go as far as, say, the BENEFITS) of social anxiety? If looked at it correctly, your social anxiety can also be a strength. I want to explore that in this week’s episode so that maybe you can stop being so harsh on yourself and add a new perspective to the complex nature of social anxiety.
Here are five benefits of social anxiety:
- Your self-awareness: Few people are aware of themselves (how they walk around, what they say and do, their impact, etc.), which could have adverse effects on the impression they make. But you, my dear, are highly mindful of your every word and action. Social anxiety has made you aware. You want to show up as your best self and create a safe environment for people. How amazing is that! Of course, this can also be detrimental if taken to the other extreme, so make sure you redirect this: use your self-awareness to enhance your interactions and relationships. By being conscious of your actions and words, you can tailor your behavior in more empathetic and considerate ways, improving your relationships and social interactions.
- Your thoughtfulness: When it comes down to it, you don't want to inconvenience anyone. You're very thoughtful and polite and try to stay out of people's way to the point where you self-sacrifice or even self-sabotage. You carefully choose your words because they can significantly impact the other person. Social anxiety has made you care. You can redirect this strength so you're not the victim; instead, use your thoughtfulness in invaluable and impactful ways, such as being an empathetic listener and supporter of others. This is one of your most essential qualities as a friend.
- Your clarity: You have a direct connection with your emotions and are very clear about them. While you may not have learned to manage or sit with them for too long, knowing exactly how you feel and why is a strength most people can only dream of having. Social anxiety has made you understand. If you can talk to your emotions as they come up and reach an understanding with them, you'll get new levels of personal growth fast.
- Your attention to detail: You obsess over details. You notice things most people would never do. You’re attentive to what’s going on and want to give others the best experience possible with you. Whether having a friend over or going to a team outing, you notice everything going on to adapt to the situations at hand. Social anxiety has made you see.
- Your level of empathy: You’re less likely to judge and welcome people for who they are. You know the feeling of being excluded, so you ensure no one else has to deal with that. Because of this, you can connect with people authentically and understand where they’re coming from when they share something with you. There’s no downside to this unless you’re taking on the world’s sorrows and drowning yourself in them. Something I’ve fallen into the trap of. Social anxiety has made you feel.
It is important to note that these are just some of the potential strengths and benefits of having social anxiety. Not everyone with social anxiety will experience these benefits, but chances are you can relate to some of them.
The whole point of this podcast is to make you see yourself differently, so I hope you can turn some of the challenges you’ve had with social anxiety into strengths that can direct you toward new opportunities in life.
That’s not to say the work is done; you must keep working on managing social anxiety, and then you’ll get to a point where you’re reaping the benefits of your experience with it while having moved on from it. It makes for a happy ending, for sure.
Have you ever thought of the positive side of social anxiety? Is there anything else you can see as a gift? I'd love to hear your thoughts.